Bearing As a Means of Self Acceptance

I think bearing and concealing also has something to do with the way you see yourself: when you choose to accept yourself the way you are, you make a decision to accept love so that you hardly notice your own imperfections, let alone be provoked by them.

When the Bible says that love covers a multitude of sins (1 Peter 4:8, Proverbs 10:12), it can be taken in the context of the way God sees us, the way we see ourselves and the way we see other people.

Some Christians believe that in order to please God, you have to make yourself fully, consciously aware of all your weaknesses, but that is not what God’s love does. Bearing or concealing together with longsuffering enables a person to forebear themselves or another person – just as they are without any exception and without any prerequisites. Forbearance is all about acceptance.

Love enables a person to accept themselves and other people, just as they are, without first having to insist on some sort of change being made. Christians mistakenly believe that they have to constantly examine themselves for hidden sins or that they have to remind themselves of past mistakes. But the Bible says that we should forget the former things and look towards the future.

13 Brethren, I do not count myself to have apprehended; but one thing I do, forgetting those things which are behind and reaching forward to those things which are ahead, 14 I press toward the goal for the prize of the upward call of God in Christ Jesus.
Philippians 3:13-14

Longuffering in Relation to Bearing (Part 2)

Love does not announce another person’s personal problems to other people, when doing so will be of no benefit to the other person or to anyone else. Bearing or concealing has nothing to do with keeping silent about criminal activity - love will expose a person’s wrongdoing if the other person’s actions have a detrimental effect on other people. If it is a private matter, then love will be more inclined to keeping silent about it.

The Biblical concept of longsuffering, on the other hand, has more to do with the subduing of a sinful, passionate reaction to other people’s sins and wrong behaviour; this passionate reaction is along the lines of anger and resentment.
Although the Greek word for bearing or concealing used in 1 Corinthians 13:7, also appears in 1 Thessalonians 3:1 in the context of forbearance or endurance - these two attributes of love, longsuffering and bearing, are not the same. Longsuffering and bearing both have a vital part to play in the establishment of Christ-like character.

When a person has a nature of love, they will hardly notice the faults of other people, unless it is important for that person to know about it. If you were consciously aware of what some people were up to, it might change the way that you behave towards them.

We can sometimes feel offended and frustrated that we did not know what a person was doing when we had relations with them. But it is often the will of God that we are not made aware of such things because it would be of no benefit to either party. You could argue that you could have warned the other person of their sin and its potential consequences; but bear in mind that if that was the case, then God would be the first to let you know about it.

We have to face facts that we are not meant to know everything. Some things are just none of our business. As the saying goes, “A little knowledge is a dangerous thing.” It is dangerous because you might not know enough or be in a position in order for you to effectively act upon the little knowledge that you have. This is why gossiping and heresy is so dangerous, because it can change the way you perceive certain people and the way that you act towards them.
Just because someone you know is doing something wrong, that does not give you the right to treat them unfairly, be rude to them or to reject them.

When two people form a relationship, they have to come as they are, under the proviso that they will stay just the way they are throughout the duration of the relationship - not that you can transform them into something else, given a bit of encouragement and persuasion, if they do end up changing for the better, then that is a bonus.

None of us are perfect, that is why we need the love of God to cover up and hide our imperfections, so that the other person hardly notices them, or at least, has the endurance to put up with it.

We usually develop this confidence in the love of God, to cover up and mask our imperfections. When God wants to make us favourable in someone’s sight, He will throw a veil over our imperfections, so that the other person does not see them. God can gauge just how much of His glory and how much of our flesh, our imperfection, the other person sees. The love of God not only covers the way we look, but also what we do and what we say.

This covering works both ways: we have to be willing to accept the love of God so that we do not become overly sensitive to the imperfections of other people. When we accept fear over love, it is so that we can protect ourselves from harm and loss. Fear rejects love and ensures that we are sensitive to the imperfections of other people. The result is that without a covering of love, we will only see the worst in someone who will cause us to criticize and reject them.

Whilst we may think that this is a suitable course of action to adopt in life, it can keep us out of the will of God and can cause us to become very resentful and rather lonely. It is the classic nobody-is-like-me and nobody-is-good-enough-for-me syndrome. We do not become more holy, despite what some people think, by taking the moral high ground and pointing out other people’s sins and imperfections.

Longuffering in Relation to Bearing (Part 1)

There seems to be a correlation between the Biblical concept of bearing or covering, stegō (G4722), and longsuffering, makrothumeō (G3114).

According to Geneva Bible Translation Notes on 1 Corinthians 13:4, the Greek word makrothumeō (G3114) means literally, "defers wrath".

4 Love suffers long…
1 Corinthians 13:4

4 Love meekly and patiently bears ill treatment from others…
1 Corinthians 13:4 WET

The term suffers long or longsuffering is the Greek word makrothumeō (G3114). This word is made up from the words makros, long in terms of time or distance, and thumos, passion primarily used in reference to anger and wrath.

John Wesley’s Explanatory Notes says the following about longsuffering in this verse:

The love of God, and of our neighbour for God's sake, is patient toward, all men. It, suffers all the weakness, ignorance, errors, and infirmities of the children of God; all the malice and wickedness of the children of the world: and all this, not only for a time, but to the end. And in every step toward overcoming evil with good, it is kind, soft, mild, benign. It inspires the sufferer at once with the most amiable sweetness, and the most fervent and tender affection. Love acteth not rashly - Does not hastily condemn any one; never passes a severe sentence on a slight or sudden view of things. Nor does it ever act or behave in a violent, headstrong, or precipitate manner. Is not puffed up - Yea, humbles the soul to the dust.

Albert Barnes’ Notes on the Bible includes the following description with regards to longsuffering in 1 Corinthians 13:4.

The word used here μακροθυμεῖ makrothumei denotes “longanimity,” slowness to anger or passion; longsuffering, patient endurance, forbearance. It is opposed to haste; to passionate expressions and thoughts, and to irritability. It denotes the state of mind which can bear long when oppressed, provoked, calumniated, and when one seeks to injure us; compare Romans 2:4; Romans 9:22; 2 Corinthians 6:6; Galatians 5:22; Ephesians 4:2; Colossians 3:12; 1Timothy 1:16; 2Timothy 3:10; 2Timothy 4:2; 1 Peter 3:20; 2 Peter 3:15.

Adam Clarke’s Commentary on the Bible says the following about longsuffering in 1 Corinthians 13:4

Charity suffereth long - Μακροθυμει, Has a long mind; to the end of which neither trials, adversities, persecutions, nor provocations, can reach. The love of God, and of our neighbor for God’s sake, is patient towards all men: it suffers all the weakness, ignorance, errors, and infirmities of the children of God; and all the malice and wickedness of the children of this world; and all this, not merely for a time, but long, without end; for it is still a mind or disposition, to the end of which trials, difficulties, etc., can never reach. It also waits God’s time of accomplishing his gracious or providential purposes, without murmuring or repining; and bears its own infirmities, as well as those of others, with humble submission to the will of God.

John Gill’s Exposition of the Entire Bible includes the following description with regards to longsuffering in 1 Corinthians 13:4.

such a person is slow to anger when abused, not quick of resentment, nor hasty to revenge when affronted; but exercises forbearance, suffers long, and bears much, and is ready to forgive:

Concealing The Things God Tells You

Concealment is also important for believers who receive revelation knowledge from God, which they are not yet ready to share with other people. Be warned, God will test you in this area.

God could reveal something seemingly amazing to you and in your eagerness to do something for God and to please other people, you open your mouth and tell other people about it. But guess what? They are not ready to receive that revelation, and because of this, they cannot understand or relate to what you are saying.

Such tests are often designed to make us see that our motives are not right: we often seek the wisdom of God so that we can use it for our own selfish purposes. If a believer is insecure they will often seek after the right things with the wrong motive.

You will also notice that you can develop an overwhelming urge to share things with other people with the expectation that they will listen to what you have to say with enthusiasm and encourage you with it.

But time and again you may find that whenever you have this expecation, you usually find that when you actually do tell people your secret - you find that you don’t get the response that you were expecting and hoping for. A lot of the time, when you tell other people things, you find that they are quick to discourage you and to cause you to reconsider.

The motive for sharing such things often comes out of a sense of inadequcy and the feeling of rejection from others. The people in your world might impress you with their confidence, charisma and anecdotes of what they do. This leads some people to feel a sense of inferiority in comparison and hence the need to achieve and to provide interesting anecdotes to people.

God has called us to be witnesses for Christ, but this does not necessarily mean that we will always have exciting anecdotes to tell, neither does it mean that we will always be living a life of luxury with all the latest cutting-edge fashions, furniture, gadgets and mod-cons.

Witnessing for Christ has a lot more to do with who you are as a person, much more than what you do or what you have. What you do and what you have usually comes as a direct consequence of who you are as a person.

I think we want to share things with other people, whether they be positive or negative, when we are in desperate need of the approval of others. We might be with people who tend to gossip about other people, at work for instance. We then proceed to join in with other people’s judgements of other people because we want to form an alliance with that group and to escape the kind of critisism they are giving other people. As the saying goes, “If you can’t beat them, join them.”

When we have the love of God in us, then we have the peace, joy and assurance that we need, and therefore, we no longer feel the need to gossip to to let other people know about the secrets that God is confiding in us.

We need the love of God so that we can know when to keep quiet about the things that God is revealing to us personally. If God gives you a message of the great things He has for you, it is your responsibility to be sensitive as to how and when you choose to share that information with other people.

Christians who live disappointing, uneventful lives are often rather scant on exciting anecdotes, so they are usually a little too keen to tell others about what God has said to them. If God tells you that you are going to travel the world extensively preaching His Word, it would be wise for you to stop and ask yourself if it is really the right time to share that information with other people.

Love Bears (Covers) All Things – Part 2

The Greek word stegō (G4722) appears a total of 4 times in the King James Version of the Bible. It is translated as forbear twice and beareth and suffer both once.

According to Strong’s Dictionary of Greek Words, the Greek word stegō (G4722) translated bears in the King James Version, means:

From G4721; to roof over, that is, (figuratively) to cover with silence (endure patiently): - (for-) bear, suffer.

According to Thayer’s Greek Definitions, this Greek word means:

1) deck, thatch, to cover
1a) to protect or keep by covering, to preserve
2) to cover over with silence
2a) to keep secret
2b) to hide, conceal
2b1) of the errors and faults of others
3) by covering to keep off something which threatens, to bear up against, hold out against, and so endure, bear, forbear

The main meaning of this word is to cover. Strong and Thayer both agree that this concept of covering, in the context of the Bible, includes to cover with silence. Strong continues the analogy of covering with silence to mean endure patiently.

Vincent’s Word Studies says of this word, in this verse:

It keeps out resentment as the ship keeps out the water, or the roof the rain.

Jamieson, Fausset and Brown Commentary gives expression to this word in 1 Corinthians 13:7, meaning a holding fast to integrity under stress, without lapsing into selfishness and complaint:

Beareth all things — without speaking of what it has to bear. The same Greek verb as in 1 Corinthians 9:12. It endures without divulging to the world personal distress. Literally said of holding fast like a watertight vessel; so the charitable man contains himself in silence from giving vent to what selfishness would prompt under personal hardship.

John Wesley’s Explanatory Notes provides the following description:

Love covereth all things - Whatever evil the lover of mankind sees, hears, or knows of any one, he mentions it to none; it never goes out of his lips, unless where absolute duty constrains to speak.

Albert Barnes’ Notes on the Bible describes the concept of “bearing all” in this verse, as follows:

Beareth all things - Compare the note at 1 Corinthians 9:12. Doddridge renders this, “covers all things.” The word used here (στέγει stegei) properly means to “cover” (from στέγη stegē, a covering, roof; Matthew 8:8; Luke 7:6); and then to “hide,” “conceal,” not to make known. If this be the sense here, then it means that love is disposed to hide or conceal the faults and imperfections of others; not to promulgate or blazon them abroad, or to give any undue publicity to them. Benevolence to the individual or to the public would require that these faults and errors should be concealed. If this is the sense, then it accords nearly with what is said in the previous verse. The word may also mean, to forbear, bear with, endure. Thus, it is used in 1 Thessalonians 3:1, 1 Thessalonians 3:5. And so our translators understand it here, as meaning that love is patient, long-suffering, not soon angry not disposed to revenge. And if this is the sense, it accords with the expression in 1 Corinthians 13:4, “love suffers long.” The more usual classic meaning is the former; the usage in the New Testament seems to demand the latter. Rosenmuller renders it, “bears all things;” Bloomfield prefers the other interpretation. Locke and Macknight render it “cover.” The “real” sense of the passage is not materially varied, whichever interpretation is adopted. It means, that in regard to the errors and faults of others, there is a disposition “not” to notice or to revenge them. There is a willingness to conceal, or to bear with them patiently.

Conclusion

In summary, Albert Barnes attributes two meanings to the attribute of love to “bear all”. Firstly, it is to keep secret the faults of others and so as to not gossip. Secondly, the word may also mean to forbear, bear with and endure. It is used in this context in 1 Thessalonians 3:1 and 1 Thessalonians 3:5. This makes the concept of “to bear all” similar to that of longsuffering in verse 4.

Albert Barnes agrees that both meanings have their relevance and summarises with the following statement:

It means, that in regard to the errors and faults of others, there is a disposition “not” to notice or to revenge them. There is a willingness to conceal, or to bear with them patiently.

Albert Barnes also makes the point that the concealment of other people’s errors has a correlation with the previous verse: see 1 Corinthians 13:6.

Love Bears (Covers) All Things – Part 1

In the same way that seemingly minor attributes of a person’s character or physique can become attractive to another person, people can adopt a disfavourable attitude towards the attributes of someone whom they do not favour.

A work colleagues laugh, the hairstyle of someone you know in church, there are so many things we can identify and dislike in another person if we do not favour them. A small spot on someone’s nose can become like a mountain with people that we don’t like.

It is human nature that we identify all the things that we like and find attractive with the people we favour, whilst simultaneously turning a blind eye to the little imperfections they have. Similarly, we tend to identify and pour scorn upon those minor imperfections that people have, if we do not favour them, whilst ignoring the good qualities that they have. The love of God can accentuate the good attributes of a person’s personality and physical looks, and at the same time, cover up the things which are not so appealing.

It is an aspect of love to cover up, and ignore, those things which are not so favourable, even to the point whereby we don’t even notice them, whilst if we do notice them, we certainly don’t let them bother us.

8 And above all things have fervent love for one another, for "love will cover a multitude of sins."
1 Peter 4:8

8 Above all continue to love one another fervently, for love throws a veil over a multitude of faults.
1 Peter 4:8 WNT

7 [Love] bears all things…
1 Corinthians 13:7

7 [Love is] always slow to expose…
1 Corinthians 13:7 Moffatt NT

Actually, the love of God can take things a step further to the point were we can actually find something interesting or enjoyable about a person, which we would normally not even notice or we would even dislike. This is something that often happens in romantic relationships. Say for instance, you could fall in love with someone who feels insecure about themselves; as a result, he or she regularly fishes for compliments. Without love, this little character flaw could become rather irritating, but with love, it could be seen as rather sweet and endearing.

When God’s love influences the way we perceive things, we see imperfection covered by His perfection. Therefore, we cannot help but accept or even delight in the faults of others.

It can be quite an unpleasant surprise when a person falls out of love with someone they were once close to, without love, they suddenly see that person for who they really are. All of a sudden, those things that the person accepted or even delighted in become highly noticeable and are likely to make the person wonder why they did not notice those things before or why delighted in certain characteristics before.

God’s love not only covers, it also resists taking offence and getting angry over things. So even if a person notices something they dislike about a person, with love, it will prevent them from getting irritated about it.

Perhaps then, the ability of love to cover, is also linked to the ability of love in relation to longsuffering?